The Not So Secret Life of Duy: June 2008

Tuesday, December 18, 2007
(Stolen from my xanga)

BRACEFACE

It's gone. All of it. I know I'm supposed to be super crazy hyphy and everything, but I'm just not feeling it. It's like a part of me is missing. I'm SO depressed I don't even know if I can go another day without the feeling of metal wires running across the fronts of my teeth. I find it a little ironic that the retainers don't aid in "retaining" my emotions. I hunger for that geeky look in the mirror I get every time I smile. IT'S AWESOME. it WAS awesome. It was a symbol of my youth. My innocence. My HAPPINESS. Now its gone. And so is my happiness. My strong facade of confidence vanished along with my dental appliances. I was the coolest kid in school repping the tightest (literally) teeth. I walked around like no tomorrow brandishing my teeth and showing off their shiny exterior. I was hot. SUPER hot. DUYHOT. The only kind of REAL hot. It feels awkward now. As I sit here typing away I continue to swish my tongue back and forth on my front teeth. Slowly bringing them around into the back. Drats. They're gone too. I was hoping they'd forget the ones in the back. My braces. I tried hard to keep my mouth as small as possible, but the evil scientist was stronger than I. She has power over me. She had power over my tiny pieces of wire and rubber bands. I was powerless. Now as I think back, I wonder. Could I have done something? COULD I? Maybe I should have given her the old "duy charm" or something. Make her infatuated with me. Then we would've fallen in love and move to an uncharted island off the coast of Puerto Rico. Then we'd be married in an old Spanish church left behind from early western exploration and proclaim our love for each other under starlit skies of dark dark black with the faintest hint of blue in the far off mist. We'd stare at each other's eyes, and kiss. Then a flood would ravage our island and she'd be swept to sea.Yeah. I should have done that so she would've left my braces alone! FUCK DUY! YOU'RE A FUCKING AARTARD! WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST DO THAT! AT LEAST IT WAS DOABLE! fuck me. NO. NO MORE OF THIS FUCKING "YOU SUCK" AND "FUCK ME" BUSINESS DUY. Enough is enough. I'm going to start an online business of some sort. yeah! And I'm going to hire people who have the same desires as me, the same lust as me. People who love braces and can't live without them! I'm going to start an underground replacement braces market where we make braces for those who don't need them for teeth straightening but for LIFE STRAIGHTENING. After that I'll move to hollywood and become a superBRACEFACE star or some sort and be living in the life of braces. I can see me now. All those girls on my shoulders. All of them...wearing fake braces. I'll start a trend! THE BRACES TREND. Everyone will start going "nice braces! where'd you get them?" "Oh I got these at hollister" Yeah! I'll start selling these at local clothing retailers as accessories! THEY'LL BE THE NEXT STUNNA SHADES! I'LL BE SO RICH AFTER MY GRAMMY NOMINATION FOR MY TOP DOUBLE PLATNIUM ALBUM "BRACES MAKE YOU COOL" AND MY SUPER OSCAR CRAZY MOVIE STARRING WILL SMITH " DUY IS LEGEND" THAT I'LL BUY THE ENTIRE WORLD AND SEND ROCKETS INTO SPACE THAT SOMEHOW CONSTRUCT A ROUND PIECE OF WIRE ACROSS THE WORLD LIKE A HALO AND ENCLOSE THE WORLD IN A RING JUST LIKE JUPITER! EXCEPT ITS A PAIR OF... YOU GUESSED IT! BRACES!

To my dear brother, Duy,

Who would always randomly bring home a book,

shove the story into my face,

tell me how good it is

and persuade me into reading it.

Winter break is over, which means I can finally see Ashley Nelson once again, but she probably won’t even acknowledge my presence. I mean, who would? I’m only an Asian kid surrounded by stereotypical Caucasian preps. I’m like a fish in an ocean of sharks; I just don’t belong here, and the longer I stay imprisoned in this awful place, the higher the chance of me being eaten alive, slowly losing my self esteem little by little.

Growing up in a foreign neighborhood wasn’t all that easy. At first, I didn’t really notice the fact that I was being treated differently from everyone else, and the fact that I was being discriminated because of my race, but then seventh grade came, and realization hit me, bringing me back into reality. It’s as if at first, you’re at the top of a seesaw, and the next minute, you’re falling down, down, down.

“Shoot,” I muttered under my breath. I was running late to class yet another time, but it’s not like it really mattered, right? No one was waiting for me at school anyway, and there isn’t that much of a point going to school if you don’t have the warmth of friends crowding around you once you arrive, welcoming you with kind smiles plastered on their faces. Oh, how I longed for that feeling. I arrived just before the final bell rang which silenced the students and eased them into their seats. I pushed my way back and headed for a seat right by the window, but as I was about to sit down, instead of landing on the chair, I found myself crashing against the floor. Here we go again, I thought. Laughter filled the air as I just sat there, being the loser I was.

“Nice one, Rick,” complemented Jeremy. They exchanged high fives and walked to their seats, clearly giving off an overconfident aura. I quickly regained my posture and grabbed my chair, this time making sure no one was going to kick it away, making me collapse and causing a big scene to form all over again.

Lunch eventually arrived; I received my food from the lunch ladies and went to an empty table, ready to eat without any company. A sigh escaped from my mouth, and as I was about to bite into my burrito, Ashley sat down right next to me, her perfume invading my space.

My memories of the last few weeks with Ashley suddenly flashed into my mind. Winter Break seemed extremely short, yet so long at the same time. We were completely lost in all the fun we did: snowboarding, chilling, and all that regular good stuff, just basically getting to know each other more and more. I seriously kept thinking that my hooking up with Ashley over break was all a hallucination, but fortunately, it wasn’t, instead, it was the real deal.

My sudden flashback vanished once I noticed Ashley’s lips moving.

“Hey, Mark! How’s it going?” she inquired.

“Pretty good, how are you?”

“Oh, the usual. Quite bored, actually.”

“Really, now? Well, at least your Friday won’t be boring,” I said, a mischievous grin growing upon my lips.

“And why is that?” she asked with one of her eyebrows raised.

“Why, you ask? Well, because we’re going to the movies, if you have time, that is.”

“Hmm… Let me check my schedule,” she replied, pretending to take out an imaginary pocket calendar. “I don’t know if I have time. I’m a pretty busy girl, Mark,” she said, as a laugh escaped from her smiling lips.

“Yeah, yeah, I guess we just won’t go then,” I responded, playing along. I pretended to look utterly disappointed.

“What? No! I was only joking, I’m not busy,” she quickly said, trying to persuade me.

“No, no, it’s okay, Ashley. I’ll just stay home, all alone, with nothing to do…”

I looked at her face, and I noticed that she was actually taking this seriously. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Laughter burst out of me, making me hold my stomach. “Oh my gosh, Ashley, you are way too gullible,” I said between fits of laughter. She soon gave in and began to laugh, too.

We must have been laughing really loud or something, because I happened to notice the entire cafeteria staring at us. Our blissful laughter faded as Rick began to walk towards us. Ashley and I glanced at one another, our faces showing sheer confusion. This look of pure anger was imprinted upon Rick’s face, and the blood traveling through his veins were probably boiling with his fury. When he finally reached us, he grabbed Ashley’s wrist and began to drag her away. “What the heck are you doing, sitting over there, Ashley?!” shouted Rick.

“What do you mean? I can sit wherever I want, and who said you could drag me off like that?” Ashley argued back, shrugging off his grip.

“Don’t you dare give me that tone, Ashley. You’re not even supposed to be with his kind. He’s a freaking rice picker!” snickered Rick.

I would have let that silly remark go, but I noticed that Rick’s firm grip left a nice shade of red on Ashley’s wrist. For once in my life, I gathered all the courage in me and stood up for myself and her.

“She’s not supposed to be with my kind, hmm? Oh really, now? Wow, then whoever made that rule would probably be incredibly pissed at this moment, because you know what? We’re together,” I said back, a smirk playing on my lips.

“Whatever, Mark. Shut up, okay? It’s pretty obvious that you’re lying, and you’re pretty stupid for announcing that lie in front of Ashley, because she’s not going to let you get away with it, right, babe?”

“Do not call me babe ever again, and Mark isn’t lying. We are together. Now why don’t you shut up instead, and roll on out of here?” Ashley said, getting annoyed.

“Why you little-“ Rick was trying to say, but the bell signaling the end of lunch rang, cutting him off. I quickly gathered my stuff, and Ashley did the same. As the bell came to a finish, Rick threatened, “I’m still not done with you, Mark,” and then walked away.

“You okay, Ashley?” I asked, staring at her wrist.

“Yeah, perfectly fine. Don’t worry about it,” Ashley assured.

“That’s good, but we should really get going.” She nodded in approval, and we both said our good-byes as we parted.

During class for the last few periods of school, I couldn’t help but think about what I said back then, “Wow, then whoever made that rule would probably be incredibly pissed at this moment, because you know what? We’re together.” Where on earth did that come from? It’s like a part of me that I kept hidden for a long time finally opened up. I didn’t feel as much of a loser as I did before, and I felt as if a new sort of fire was burning inside of me, making me feel more and more alive.

School came to an end, and I hurriedly collected all of my materials. I stuffed them into my backpack, and walked hastily to Ashley’s class. It turned out that she wasn’t out yet, so I had to wait for a bit outside of her door. Right as I was getting to the end of a song I was humming, the door slammed open, and students whisked pass me as they tried to get home as fast as possible. After about ten people pushing their way through, I caught a glimpse of Ashley’s blonde hair. She greeted me with a smile and hug, her gray eyes giving off a pleasant sparkle. “Are you ready to go home, my lady? The ball awaits you,” I questioned, bowing and putting my arm out for her to grab.

“Why, yes, I am,” she replied, curtsying before she grabbed my arm. We erupted into laughter and started our way towards her house. After about fifteen minutes or so, we finally reached our destination.

“Wait here, I want to show you something,” she said as she ran into her house. I patiently waited for her, but after about five minutes or so, out of nowhere, Rick appeared in front of me, his gang of friends behind him.

“Hey there, Mark. We have a little present for you,” Rick said. He had a smile on his face, but the thing was that this smile didn’t have a friendly feeling at all; it was more of an evil grin, as if he was hiding something.

“What do you want now, Rick?” I asked, nervousness all around me.

“Aww, don’t be so rude now, Mark. I just want to show you my gratitude. Isn’t that right, guys?” he questioned. His friends nodded with him, and the gang began to close in on me, taking a step forward each second. My instincts told me to back up, therefore I did, but unluckily, there was a gate behind me, causing me to come to a halt. Before I knew it, a fist hit me in the jaw, and another punched me in the stomach. I crouched over, moaning in pain. As I tried to get up to defend myself, Jeremy pushed me back down and kicked me in the ribs.

“How do you like that, huh? This better teach you not to mess with us again. Open your eyes for once, will ya, you chink?” teased Derek, another one of Rick’s allies. At first, when I was only a loser, I would have just ignored this, but no, not this time. I’m really pissed now. With all my strength, I was able to kick Derek in his family jewels, which made him fall onto the floor and roll in absolute pain. Rick and his friends stared at Derek and me in total shock; this left them paralyzed and guard free. Just as I was about to make another attack, Rick snapped out of his state of astonishment and twisted my arm backwards. I yelped out in pain, and right as he was about to pull it back more, Ashley came running out of her house.

“Mark, I-“ she said, before gasping at the sight of Rick’s followers laying kicks and punches at me. “What the heck is going on?!” she screamed. She then noticed Rick about to dislocate my shoulder and ran to my aid. “Rick, you’re such a racist jerk! Why can’t you just understand that Mark is exactly the same as us? Just because he looks different and has different customs doesn’t mean he’s not a teenager like us and has feelings. I never thought you’d go this low, Rick,” scolded Ashley, obviously disappointed. Rick’s shoulders slumped, his head hung low, and as he walked away, he didn’t have any confidence whatsoever, but instead, regret.

“Oh my God, Mark, you look so messed up,” Ashley said, her eyes watering up.

“Nah, I’m a big boy now. This didn’t hurt a bit,” I joked. Ashley smiled at me, and her tears flowed freely down her face, creating a trail.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she said as she hugged me tightly.

“Me, too, Ashley. Me, too.”

The Not So Secret Life of Duy

Monday, June 9, 2008

BRACEFACE no more...

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Wandering Courage by Thuyvy Tu

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