without a second glance

too quick to think clearly
too slow to write freely
lost in my own thoughts
my own losts, my own farts
brain farts, but not really
but only if you want
but so silly
and sometimes its like that
you think, you forget
you live, you regret
heck, I don’t know where I’m at
but I know I got a hat
but again, that doesn’t make sense
but what does?
Who and what and oh, I’m so tense
Why and how and oh, I’m so fenced
In my own world, in my own thoughts
My iron-wrought
Fence
My own immense
Spectrum of me
A color, distorted from the sea
But so close to me
I wish I could just be
And be
And be
Me.

Me, Myself, and I

I find myself looking at myself a lot more now. No, I'm not getting any more narcissistic, if anything, less. My bathroom mirror, the huge paneled mirrors of my closet, my laptop screen, whatever I can find, I look. I stare at myself, hoping to see the real me deep within, but I always just see myself, looking back. But its strange, because I always stare, harder, and harder, to try to dig deeper, but I never see anything more than just me, again, my reflection, staring back. I stare, and I stare, and nothing changes, nothing happens, only time. When will I know?

When will I know, that the me I'm looking at, the person I see everyday in the mirror, is actually me?